A brief history of promise rings

Promise or pre-engagement rings may seem like an invention of the modern jewelry business. In fact, they have existed since the 16th century, when they would be exchanged for couples too young or poor to marry. Read on to learn more about this fascinating and ever-changing romantic tradition.

Although rings have always been used to signify commitment, there are biblical references to religious rings of devotees, it was in the 15th and 16th centuries when the bride and groom began to exchange rings to communicate and solidify their love.

There were several different types of pre-engagement rings during this period. In 16th-century England, lovers traded scrawl rings, which were encrusted with uncut diamonds or crystals. The user would use the sharp points of the diamonds to engrave the names or vows of his beloved on the window glass.

During Shakespeare’s time, poetry rings were popular with young couples. Each band was recorded with romantic sayings such as “you and no other” (you and no other) or “a ma vie de coer entero” (all my heart throughout my life), joining the words of the lover to the body of the beloved.

19th century

In 19th century Europe, engagement rings reflected the optimism and romanticism of the time. They were also more ornamental than their predecessors, reflecting both the increasing availability of semi-precious stones and the new influx of wealth to the middle classes.

Greeting rings were frequently used as engagement rings, but unengaged couples and even friends exchanged them as well. Regards rings featured a series of semi-precious stones, the first letter of which said “greetings”: emerald, garnet, amethyst, ruby, diamond, sapphire.

Other variations included the spelling of the name of the loved one, the word “love” (lapis lazuli, opal, vermarine, emerald) and the word “dearest” (diamond, emerald, amethyst, ruby, emerald, sapphire, topaz).

Modern

Not surprisingly, in the late 20th and early 21st centuries, promise rings became popular again.

In an age when courtship, the dating period, is longer than ever, couples can become frustrated with a lack of ritual and progression. The ring exchange is a way for a couple to commemorate a transition in their relationship without the increased pressures of commitment.

While most couples exchange promise rings as a way of expressing their intention to eventually marry, the tradition is open to interpretation. For some, a promise ring may signify the decision to remain abstinent before marriage or engagement. These rings are also sometimes called “purity” rings. Other couples exchange promise rings when they decide to live together before getting married, to mark the transition to a cohabiting couple.

There are also variations in the way promise rings are worn. While many women wear their rings on the ring finger of the left hand, as an engagement ring, it is also popular to wear a promise ring on the ring finger of the right hand, to avoid confusion. While modern promise rings are overwhelmingly given to women by their male partners, men can and do wear promise rings too. A small but growing subset of couples purchase matching “pair” promise rings, similar to wedding bands. Popular styles for modern rings include sterling silver, three small diamonds, and heart-shaped stone designs.

Are you thinking of getting a promise ring for your loved one? Think outside the box! Unlike engagement rings, which are usually made of diamonds, a promise ring can be anything you can imagine. In fact, if you plan to invest in a diamond engagement ring later on, you may prefer to get a promise ring with a different stone type, setting, or style.

A tradition we like: birthstones, which men used to give to their future girlfriends in Victorian times (Prince Albert surprised Queen Victoria herself with an emerald snake ring!). Pledging your engagement with a birthstone ring is a personal statement that you are sure to cherish no matter how many years pass and how many more rings you give.