And the prize is for my granddaughter

It’s rare time when I’m really on top of my schedule. Whenever I think I’m trapped, something happens that takes that and throws it out the window.

Such was the case last week. I was very happy with the fact that I was on schedule and had everything close at hand. Nothing makes me feel better.

Of course, this is mostly delusional, at least for me. If there was ever an award for being delusional, I’m pretty sure it would be at the top of the list. The amazing thing about being delusional is that you never think you are.

As I wallowed in delirium and enjoyed every moment, the kind lady of the parsonage came over and said rather brusquely, “Are you ready to go?”

At the moment, I had no idea what he was talking about. And then I replied, “Huh?”

I’m not sure if that’s really a word or not, but it accurately described my delusional moment at the time. I had no idea what he was talking about.

“You haven’t forgotten what day it is,” he said, “have you?”

I was tempted to say, “Of course not. It’s Tuesday.” Fortunately, I didn’t give in to that temptation and simply replied with another, “Huh?”

With a look of disdain, he said, “You would forget about your head if it weren’t united.”

I wouldn’t tell him, but he probably wouldn’t miss my head if he forgot. After all, I’m not wearing a hat.

“Today,” he said in a very calm voice, “the two grandchildren are receiving awards at school.”

I’m not really sure if I forgot or wasn’t listening when the instructions came to me. At this point, I wasn’t going to tell anyone, especially my wife.

“Oh yeah,” I said getting up from my chair, “I’m ready to go. Let’s go.”

He gave me one of his classic sarcastic smiles and we headed for the door.

Our granddaughter was graduating from third grade and the other from fifth grade. Unfortunately, one was at 8:30 in the morning and the other at 1 in the afternoon. It would make sense to have them all at once, but what does it make sense to do in our world today?

I didn’t want to complain, after all, they are our grandchildren, but I think the planning could have been a little better than that. After all, sitting in the school cafeteria listening to the awards ceremony is as exciting as possible.

The chairs we had to sit in were uncomfortable, which was very fortunate for me because I was not tempted to fall asleep during the ceremony. I think it was done on purpose.

Imagine receiving an award for completing third grade!

I don’t remember anything like it when I was in elementary school. Our grand prize was dropping out of school and coming home in the afternoon. It just doesn’t get better than that.

Today we live in a different world where everyone receives an award for something or, sometimes, for nothing.

Then I remembered my cell phone in my shirt pocket. It is moments like this that God had in mind when He invented this cell phone technology. I pulled out my cell phone and started checking my email.

Then I felt a sharp pain in my right ribs (thank you Eva) and I heard a voice say, “Drop that and pay attention.”

Slowly and reluctantly, I returned my cell phone to my shirt pocket and tried to pay attention, but I didn’t have enough coins. Paying attention can be very costly when you find yourself in situations like this.

The problem is that elementary school, particularly third grade, had more children than my grandchildren. They tried to give prizes and recognitions to all the children and I was only interested in one, my granddaughter.

I was meditating on this for a while and then my partner said, “Look, there it is.”

When she said that, her cell phone went out and started taking pictures of our granddaughter walking on stage to get an award. I can’t use my cell phone, but she is free to use her cell phone. Where is the justice in that?

Taking a hint from my wife, I reached for my cell phone only to realize it was too late and the moment was gone. I looked at my wife and all I could see was the big smile on her face and her saying, “I have your picture.” All I could do was smile back and congratulate her on taking the picture.

After each of the award ceremonies, my wife and I moved on and she took photos of me and the grandchildren together, which made her quite happy.

All the way home that afternoon, she laughed and chatted with excitement. “His” grandchildren received some awards. According to her, these were very special awards.

I smiled and was tempted to say, “Aren’t they my grandchildren too?” Why spoil the moment. I was excited and happy and it was worth my silence.

I remembered what Solomon said. “A time to tear and a time to sew; a time to be silent and a time to speak” (Ecclesiastes 3: 7).

A wise man knows when to “shut up.”