Laugh Away Calories – Funny Weight Loss Tips & Quotes

Did you know that you can burn calories laughing? A Vanderbilt University study showed that you can lose up to 50 calories by laughing for 10 to 15 minutes a day. By laughing, people burned 20% more calories. Laughter has other health benefits including stress reduction, boosting the immune system, natural pain relief, and increased blood flow (good for the heart), no kidding, either.

Unfortunately, your sense of humor is one of the first things you lose on a diet. Let’s try to fix it. Enjoy some humorous thoughts and laugh a little.

Tips and funny quotes to lose weight

Laughter burns calories so everyone needs a giggle… some more than others.

Do not eat that!

Forget Liposuction – Try Lip Obstruction!

Eat your food while looking at yourself in a mirror… totally naked!

Carry large helium balloons

When you eat donuts, only eat the center part.

Weigh yourself with one foot on the scale.

Have a pit bull in the kitchen

Use Parental Lock for Food Network on your TV – Eat PIN Number/Password.

Eat your food with a chopstick

LMAO is a great way to reduce weight on the hindquarters.

Don’t eat your dinner before breakfast

Ladies – Lose 5 lbs. Instantly! Drop your bag.

Instead of charging with your laptop, start charging with your desktop PC.

Attach a full-length mirror to your refrigerator door.

Hang your bikini on the fridge…definitely don’t do that if you’re a guy.

Remove the wheels from your shopping cart.

When you weigh yourself on the scale, try to defy gravity.

Use Superglue as a lip gloss

Only eat food that you can catch and kill with a toothpick

Don’t burn fat with a candle…a blowtorch will work faster.

Like the silent tree that falls in the forest… food actually has no calories if no one sees you eating it

Reduce your food intake if it weighs more than your refrigerator.

50 pounds Cell phones

Make 600 Tweets per hour. Move over 6 pack abs…. 6 pack fingers is the new fad (Note: only Twitter users can get that one)

Unfollow a few calories (another Twitter-related one you can overlook)

If you can’t pronounce the ingredients… you probably shouldn’t eat it.

Trade dinner plates with your pet: Kibbles n’ Bits and Little Friskies are great appetite suppressants.

Eat that rib roast with a straw

Set a goal to lose as much weight as your stock portfolio has in the past year.

Running to the fridge is not considered exercise.

Running to the refrigerator isn’t considered exercise…unless it’s a moving refrigerated truck.

You know you’re overweight when your computer tells you your @ is too big.

If you work at home…walking to work should not be considered daily exercise.

Exercise or exorcism: both are designed to beat you!

Hopefully you are losing weight and losing calories right now. You can enjoy more quotes for your dieting soul at Fun Weight Loss Tips. Laughter should be on everyone’s menu…it tastes delicious!

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