Lesbian relationships and friends

One of the most difficult challenges, particularly in a same-sex relationship, is setting boundaries with friends and mingling with each other’s friends. Plus, doing this while still being safe and making the other person feel like they’re the most important person in the world!

Usually in lesbian relationships, most of the friends are of the same sex. Friends can be nosy, nosy, stubborn, jealous, rude, and inconsiderate; however, they can also be fun, supportive, considerate, helpful, and great sounding boards. There is no question, friends will wreak havoc on a relationship or accept and consider.

Let’s work from the premise that the relationship is the highest priority and friends are not (but they are still very important). There are several key areas to focus on that can immediately strengthen the relationship. These areas must be established and mutually respected:

Boundaries – Agree parameters that are manageable. Determine which items are negotiable and non-negotiable. Examples: agreeing that both of you be home by 8:00 pm, unless otherwise agreed; no answering phones during dinner; cell phones are prohibited when you get into bed. If you go to happy hour, invite the other to join or at least communicate plans and get home on time. Remember, these limits must be agreed upon. If you end up policing and penalizing because of limits, what you have in place isn’t working. Boundaries are being and feeling respectful to each other, not holding each other hostage.

Communication – Make yourself feel special, loved, safe and protected. Talk to each other about everything. Find out what is important to others, feelings, favorite things, hobbies, goals and dreams, fears and phobias, food, children, families, etc. Get to really know yourself better than anyone else. Build trust and respect. Make others feel valued and important.

Common interests – Explore what you like to do together, such as projects, travel, entertainment with friends, cooking, golf, fishing, hiking, etc. You don’t have to do everything together, but it’s healthy to do some (enough) things together. It’s important to have fun together and feel connected. Orchestrate your relationship so that they’re not always running in parallel, but instead have enough moments of intersection to keep them in sync with each other.

Organize social opportunities – One way to mingle with each other’s friends is to host social times together in your home, such as dinner parties and game nights. Another is to plan outings with joint friends, such as happy hours, going to dinner and movies, etc. The key is to become more comfortable with each other’s friends. Make efforts to mix friends and be more inclusive.

Spontaneity – Surprise each other in ways that you know are appreciated and appreciated. Break the routine and break up with everyone else and do it for each other. Make others feel exceptional.

Long-term happy relationships must be nurtured and treated as the highest priority. Focus on enjoying your time together. Include friends when appropriate and mutually agreeable. There should be no feeling of competition for time, attention, and love! Friends should be fun additions.

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