Male Sexual Arousal: How Lap Dancing and Strip Clubs Affect Male Sexual Desire, Arousal, and Behavior

A man has been lying to his wife. For months he has been secretly hanging out at night to exotic dance clubs, rubbing shoulders with strippers and receiving erotic dances (which he chooses to believe are “innocent” and “harmless”). You’ve been enjoying your own little secret world that gives you a sensation of sensual arousal and illicit overall body pleasure. He tells himself that he is “not cheating.” However, inevitably, after an indefinite time, his wife discovers what he has been up to. To your surprise, dismay, and disappointment, your spouse is not as receptive or accepting. She is enraged, furious, hurt, devastated, and perhaps even feels and behaves out of control. You may risk losing everything – your marriage, your home, and your family.

At this point, the man often feels: “I have to find a way to change this. I am attracted to my wife. I love her very much. She is beautiful. She has been good to me. Children. I do not want a divorce. I want to find a way to make up for it. I thought he was being really ‘cool’ going to these clubs. Now I realize how immature he was. “

So the question arises: Why have you gone to see strippers? Why are you paying for lap dances when you have a beautiful wife at home, whom you say you love?

The answer, if the man is honest, sometimes he is. “I am attracted to my wife, but she expects me to ‘perform’ for her or she expects me to always initiate sex. She thinks I do not want her because I have not been so interested in being intimate with her lately. The truth is that sometimes I have fear. She hopes that I will always be ready and that I satisfy her. Lately, she gets mad if I don’t meet her expectations, especially since she knows that I have received gratification from some of these other women. “

So what is it about strip clubs, strippers, and lap dancing that makes some men come back eager for more while neglecting their readily available wife whom they claim to love?

A typical male response might be: “In dance clubs, I can relax, be myself, have a few drinks, listen to music and see some beautiful bodies moving slowly, luring me into a state of arousal. I could invite one of these beautiful young ladies. at my table. She could smile at me, maybe touching my arm, or whispering something seductive in my ear. She could call me honey or baby, offering to make me feel good if I want to dance with her. “

At home, when it comes to sexual desire, some men will say, “I often feel like a scared child about to be scolded by his angry mother.” You could share that at the club you have sometimes heard other men say, “I have to go home and do my old,” as if it were a chore or heavy work to overcome, rather than the pleasant experience of true intimacy. can be. .

What do exotic strippers and dancers do that men crave but don’t get at home?

First, man is totally receiving. You have nothing to do but be there. The woman does all the flirting and seduction. She moves her body in a seductive way. You may gradually remove some of your clothing. You can arch your back and stick your butt out, “an accepting position” that is known to trigger sexual arousal in male mammals. Some strippers won’t touch guys at all, but will come very close to touching men’s faces with their breasts, their crotch, their butt, etc. However, most strippers will touch and allow touching, even if they’re not technically supposed to. This is what will make you earn the most money. Then there are the special “champagne rooms”. For a very high hourly rate, a man can spend some time in a very private room with the woman of his choice. In this case, you can offer additional sexual favors that you claim you only offer to “special” clients.

Second, the exotic dancer’s goal is to stimulate the man, tease him, act like a master at arousing her, and continually promise him ever-increasing pleasure. She makes no demands, seems to have no expectations of him, and gives him no arguments. But there is also no real back-and-forth communication (except allowing you to express your unhappiness and frustrations with your life, your marriage, or whatever) and there is no love. Sometimes a man begins to feel “love” for an exotic dancer, but what he loves is only the image she presents and the way she is pleasing him. Most likely, he has no idea who she really is.

The truth about exotic dancers is this. The girl is there to: maintain a habit, support her family, earn some money for a specific goal or as a quick fix for an uneducated and unskilled woman to earn a considerable sum of money. This is a recession-proof business, and it’s a business, a big business. Men have needs, and when times get tough, these needs are often exacerbated. Some men will look for a way to get away and feel good, if only for a few hours.

Behind their smiles, erotic movements, and seductive words, many of these women disgust men. They don’t like the way these men get “turned on” by strangers. They despise men for “cheating” on their spouses and loved ones.

And her only goal is to make as much money as possible by keeping every man aroused and coming back for more.

The man who frequents strip clubs is meeting his own narcissistic needs for attention, arousal, stimulation, and praise. In reality, you are depriving yourself of the opportunity for true intimacy, closeness, communication, and unraveling your deepest childhood fears and insecurities. His wife suffers from the same lack of intimacy.

The solution is for each member of the couple to take responsibility for the disappearance of their intimacy, take the bull by the horn, dig in their heels, get sexual advice that both of them can benefit from, and literally start their sexual relationship from the beginning. again. Literally starting from the beginning, they should shake hands and say, “Hi. My name is … I can offer you something wonderful, make you feel better than you’ve ever felt before, if you would just take the time to get to know me. … “

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