2 ways to discover your reason for being: reason for being

Raison D’Etre is French for the reason or purpose of the existence of someone or something. Each and every person comes to this world with a purpose, unique talents to achieve that purpose, and the inner wisdom to guide them along the way. This is a birthright. Without exception. Since everyone who walks this Earth exists, one would think that everyone knew their purpose in life. Unfortunately, many people are disconnected from their Raison d’etre and struggling, successful or not, spending their life energy and time on something that can feed themselves and their family, but starve their soul to death.

We do not live in a world of one or the other. We live in a world “and”. You can do both. Simply put, the reason you are here is to express your full potential using your unique changes. You are here to harness the intuition-driven passion that accomplishes the purpose of bringing your unique gifts into this world, in an expansive way. For those who feed their soul, do what makes their heart sing, work is play and every day is an opportunity to express to the world who they are, what they are here to do. Life flows seemingly effortlessly. Even with the ups and downs, the twists and turns, life is satisfying and worth the trip!

For those who live off purpose, doing what they think they ‘should’ do, living can be exhausting and unsatisfying even if it is successful. Those who have turned their backs on their rationale feel that something is missing and sometimes joke that they “still don’t know what they want to be when they grow up” until well into adulthood. If you struggle to find joy, energy, and satisfaction in your work and life, you are living with purpose. You are not living a life aligned with who you are at your deepest core. Chances are, you don’t even know what your unique talents are, let alone use them. The funny thing is that many people do not see what their special gift is because it is so easy for them. It’s so easy and effortless for them to do what they naturally excel at that they believe anyone can do it. It does not occur to them that this unique talent is theirs as a birthright with which to express themselves and build their life around.

“Look for the wisdom that will untie your knot, look for the path that your whole being demands”. ~ Rumi

There are two easy ways to get a glimpse of who you really are and what your unique gift is to share with the world:

1. Think back to when you were a child. Who did you admire or aspire to be? Was he a famous person, a character in a book or movie, a family member or a teacher? Who amazed you, made you stop and pay attention? Once you have identified this person, what attributes of this person impressed you? Were they brave, fun, larger than life, strong, loving, free, generous, smart? What did this person or fictional character do that called you? List as many attributes and actions as you can.

For example, when I was a child I was amazed by a character that I saw in a movie on television, “Auntie Mame.” Aunt Mame was an eclectic, fun, fashionable woman who surrounded herself with wonderfully strange creative and talented people, traveled the world, and experienced fun and fascinating events in her life. She lived this life rich in experiences and mentored others to do the same. Oh, how I wanted to be Aunt Mame! However, I didn’t see myself then as outgoing enough to put myself ‘out there’ like she did, take risks and stand up for who she is and what she believed in. As an adult, I reconnected with my truth and now I live a life centered on the truth of who I am, I enjoy rich and delicious experiences, I am surrounded by a wonderfully eclectic group of talented people, and I mentor others to live their lives with the greater wealth that means to them.

Who you aspire to be, what speaks to your soul as a child, is a mirror of who you are. You love what you see in that person or character because it is a reflection of you! Appear in your life expressing your inner aunt Mame, Ninja Warrior, your hero.

2. What gives you energy? Think of a time when you were “in the zone.” You were totally present, in the moment, doing whatever it was you were doing, enjoying it fully without any sense of time and space. You were totally focused and overflowing with creativity. These ‘in the zone’ experiences are windows to see your special gifts, your unique talents. You’re energized, firing all cylinders. These are the moments when you are fully expressing yourself.

“The best thing you can do is be good at being you!” – Denis the threat

As an example, here is an anecdote about Krista Vernoff, lead writer and Emmy Award nominee for the television show “Grey’s Anatomy.” Although she loved to write, Krista thought she was supposed to be an actress. I had the belief that one was more likely to earn a living as an actress than as a writer. Many well-meaning relatives, concerned about his career choice, suggested serving in bars. She became quite good as an actress and made a living in that trade. Still, he couldn’t stop writing. Writing was so easy for her that she didn’t give herself much credit as a writer. “You have to work hard to live” and she was definitely working hard to be a working actress. For Krista, being an actress was exhausting! Writing was fun, what he did for fun, what he did to feed his soul. Success as a writer was always a certainty.

One day, a fellow actor in a play noticed that Krista ran into her dressing room to write when she was not needed on stage. Most of the actors lived to be on stage where Krista lived to be off stage where she could write. Once this fellow actor commented on this upside-down state of affairs, Krista realized that if she was to live a full life, she had to acknowledge and honor who she is: a writer. At the end of the play, Krista dedicated her life to expanding and expressing her reason for being: writing!

When you commit, give all of your attention and energy to remain firmly focused on the truth of who you are, life is magic. You have fed your soul, you are complete. As a whole person, you have the inner resources to give to others, either through your craft or your presence in their lives. You have the energy and the desire to share it with the rest of the world. You live life on purpose, in the zone, and take advantage of the passion and wisdom that are yours and yours alone. This is what you have come to do. Find a way to spend more time doing what puts you “in the zone.”

If you are not satisfied or fully committed to your life, you have a choice. Will you remain committed to this unsatisfying life or will you discover and commit to your reason for being? A fulfilling life begins when you go beyond the outer threshold of your comfort zone. The choice is yours.

“Be who you are and say what you feel. Those who care don’t care and those who matter don’t care.” – Dr. Seuss

Copyright (c) 2009 Valery Satterwhite