He says he’s not ready for a relationship, but wants to be friends. What does this excuse mean?

I often hear from women who have been given the old excuse of “I’m not ready for a relationship, but I want to be your friend” from a man who they really care about. They often wonder if this excuse is code for something else. They also wonder if, because he wants to be friends, they should continue the relationship or just let it go.

I heard a woman say, “I’ve been dating this guy for about two months. He seems serious to me. I think I might be in love with him. I think I might want to marry him one day. The other night, I started hinting at this. and he stopped me in my tracks and said he really did like me, but he’s just not ready for a relationship. He emphasized that he values ​​me as a very close friend. I know he had a nasty breakup right before he met me. So I think he’s telling the truth about that. But the whole “I just want to be friends” thing has me very sad. It would be better if he said he wanted to bring our romantic partner into a relationship slowly, but he didn’t. He said he just wants to be my friend. What does this mean? And how should I proceed? Should I continue to see him as friends? Or do I give up and walk away? “I will try to address these concerns in the next article.

Many married couples today started out as simple friends: I know things may seem to say right now, but today there are countless happily married couples who started their relationship as mere friends. In fact, many of them were on the receiving end that one of them was not ready for a relationship and yet here they are happily married. So what he’s saying today doesn’t necessarily have to dictate his future. People’s feelings and intentions change. This man was telling this woman that she was very important to him and that he wanted to continue seeing her. Yes, he was trying to redefine the relationship, but he wasn’t trying to end it.

He does not ask you to give up his life: More specifically, if he had no interest in a relationship with her, he probably would not have emphasized how important she was to his life. Men who don’t want any kind of relationship with you will often make this clear or cut off communication fairly quickly after the “I just want to be friends” speech. Nor was it the case here. He wasn’t trying to cut this woman out of his life. Quite the contrary, he was emphasizing how important she was to him.

If you want to be friends, what prevents you from being friendly ?: It’s interesting to note that most of the time when women ask me if they should just walk away after a man tells them he just wants to be friends, it often becomes very clear that this is the last thing they want to do. It is often very clear that they want to stay in your life, but their words hurt them so much that they are tempted to simply give up. I know this can hurt. But if he is really important to you, what is the harm in seeking a friendship to see where it leads? There is no reason to assume that you are not telling the truth about not being ready for a romantic relationship. It was well known that this man had a nasty breakup. He was allowed to take time to heal. In fact, taking the time to heal ensures that the next relationship has a chance to be successful.

So there really was no reason to doubt what he was saying. And since he was so important to this woman, then a good strategy might be to continue with a fun friendship and see where that leads. In fact, this can really be an enjoyable time in a relationship. And happy, healthy relationships often grow out of ties that were the first friendships. See this as an opportunity to build a base with this man. What harm can it do?

Only time will tell what his future intentions really are: I know you want me to tell you what he’s thinking. But he is the only one with those answers. However, the good news is that the truth will often reveal itself over time. If he keeps wanting to spend time with you and is looking for you, then it’s pretty obvious that he’s getting more excited about a relationship all the time. But, you really have to stay positive and see what their behavior will tell you. If it is as important as this young woman was implying, this process would probably have been worth it.