How to love yourself in difficult times when there is little growth

Dare to deepen your being

The way we treat ourselves in tough times says a lot about who we are. It’s easy to be on top of the world when things are going well and we want to hold onto this feeling in the hope that it will last forever. However, when we are not, it feels like we are destined for the railroad tracks with a train coming our way and we cannot move.

How we act on ourselves in our darkest moments lays the foundation for who we will become later on. Self love is a difficult concept for many to understand. I have had countless coaching sessions with people who have a hard time loving and appreciating themselves. This is mainly due to our formative years and the messages we receive from our parents or caregivers. They entrench themselves in our psyche and nervous system and, if reinforced, are difficult to let go. However, difficult does not mean impossible.

Is this something you have experienced? For example, how do you treat yourself when things don’t go your way? When your partner breaks up with you or your health or finances suffer. What is your inner dialogue during these times? I have experienced pain and suffering throughout my life in the form of losing my father due to illness, a broken relationship, a health crisis, and financial problems. There were times when I found it difficult to appreciate myself for the desperate self-talk that convinced me that it was my fault that I was in this situation. I felt stuck, helpless and without hope of finding a way out.

That’s why I wrote my first book because it was a subject that I was intimate with and it was new. However, I recognized that being trapped in my circumstances was not who I am. It was not the narrative that he wanted to live or succumb to. I knew that somewhere deep within me there was a presence that yearned to express itself, but I didn’t know how to get in touch with it. I wanted to love and nurture myself with compassion rather than negative self-talk. Gradually, I noticed that my conditions began to change and my internal dialogue changed when I began to meditate. So I was an anxious person, but this changed to a calm and peaceful person in the next few years. I dared to delve into my being and connect with the love within me.

Breaking old tired ways of life

The love within us awaits you to return home. It is your palace of refuge, a place that knows no limits, other than to receive you in its arms and awaken you to your authentic self. The self-love I’m talking about begins with acknowledging that tough times don’t last. They come and go from our lives to awaken us to the greater intelligence within us invested with love, light and true refuge. Loving yourself in tough times with little growth requires you to trust that what is happening will help you leave the ruins of the past behind. You are breaking down old, tired ways of life so that a new base of strength and love can emerge from your authentic self.

Spiritual teacher and author Matt Kahn offers us wisdom in his book Everything is here to help you: a loving guide to the evolution of your soul that love is more than an emotion, but a wellspring of compassion that resides within us and our task is to manifest it: “From a spiritual perspective, love is not an emotion that we feel all the time. Love is an unshakable depth of compassion and empathy that reaches inward to embrace our experiences, no matter how mixed, closed, dissatisfied, or overwhelmed we are. When we are rooted in the vibration of love, we do not have to be fully healed to manifest the kindness and care that already dwells within of us “.

There is a source of love within you that invites you to connect with it. Don’t take my word for it because it appears on your screen. Join this loving presence by standing in front of a mirror and reciting the words: “I love you” the moment you finish reading this article. Recite those three letter words when you feel joy and happiness or when you are angry or depressed. Recite them as often as you can because your external conditions don’t have to dictate how you love yourself. The love I’m talking about is always there waiting for you to come home. The more you connect with this infinite presence, the more it will become known throughout your life. The way we treat ourselves in difficult times says a lot about who we are because who we are is an energy of love. If we take time to connect with this presence more often, we will realize that our difficulties have a purpose; to bring us back to the totality of our true selves.