Raising Children: “The Path of Least Resistance”

When I first became a father, I vividly remember my mother advising me to “pick my battles carefully.” It was her belief, and it soon became mine, that when raising children, you shouldn’t put yourself in a “dictator” position. “Growing up shouldn’t be a battlefield,” my mother used to say.

His words were always in the back of my mind as I raised my daughter (now 32) and remain a very important part of my parenting philosophy as I raise my grandchildren.

The theory remains much the same, however today the phrase has become “take the path of least resistance”.

Regardless of the phrase you choose to use, the importance is in the message. A successful father will know the value of going “with the flow” regarding his children’s choices and preferences.

Whether you see it as “choosing a battle” or “choosing a path,” your attitude will undoubtedly affect the process and outcome of every situation you face with your children.

The criteria to rely on is determined by your beliefs about your role in your children’s lives. You must first define the type of relationship you want to have with your children and then be clear about your goals for them.

I grew up knowing without a doubt that my parents were “with me.” They were not “ruling” over me or remaining in concept of me. It was obvious that they saw their role as my greatest support, to encourage and inspire me to create my own identity. They understood that that would only happen by allowing me to experience life.

My parents were delighted when I asked them to try a new sport or join a new club at school. I remember once, when I was about 6 years old, after seeing my father (who was a builder) build a life-size playhouse in the backyard for us to play in, he asked me for some tools so he could build some shelves for me. bedroom to store my special books.

My dad got me the wood (pre-cut because I was too young to use a saw) and a hammer and nails and let me create my bookcase idea for my room. As I recall, they weren’t very straight or level, but they held my books and I was very proud of that.

Some parents may not have taken the time or at least didn’t want this odd piece of wood in the house, but my parents were filled with pride.

They didn’t tell me “you can’t do that” or “you’re not old enough to use a hammer.” They encouraged me, they didn’t discourage me. It would have been so easy for my father to suggest that he build the shelves for me, instead he allowed me the experience.

This experience, as well as many similar ones throughout my growing up years, taught me that anything was possible for me in my life.

The underlying message in “the path of least resistance” is to see your role in your children’s lives by accompanying them on an adventure that you are blessed to share.

Whether it’s your teenager’s style of dress or your toddlers’ desire to play in the mud, the primary focus should always be, as my mother used to say, “If it won’t hurt them physically or emotionally, leave them alone.”

Taking the path of least resistance and choosing to play a supportive role in your children’s lives will give them a tremendous sense of being valued as their own person, rather than an extension of others’ preferences.

Choosing a path of “assistance” versus “resistance” will lead your children to have courage, confidence, and healthy self-esteem. These traits are the foundation for having a positive mindset.

Perceiving yourself and the world around you in a positive way prepares you to automatically align with the basic principle of the law of attraction.

When you have a positive outlook, you are in line to attract more of the same and good things will come your way. This path will become a journey of true happiness and success.

And that, I think, is what all parents want for their children.