Tales From Tantra School: Is Your Penis Too Big, Too Small, Or Perfect?

the Kamasutra

The age-old question of size surely came up during my first time in a tantric yoga school. After weeks of spiritual and physical yoga practice on a tropical island, we were about to embrace more “juicy bits” of tantra. Thirty students sat waiting for the Swami to enter, dressed in the usual orange attire and taking a seat on their little “launch” overlooking the sea of ​​his followers. Notebooks in hand and in position on our yoga mats, we were ready and prepared for the “size does matter” talk. taken from the Kamasutra and the Ananda Ranga (an Indian sex manual written in the 16th century) the Swami proceeded to “enlighten” us.

It is small really something “bad”

Swami was direct and forthright to the point of not sparing any man or woman a blush. He launched right in with “yes, size does matter” and if a man had a small penis, in his opinion, it was due to bad karma. Looking around the room, it was easy to tell which of the men had “bad karma,” allowing me to instantly cross a few names off my list of potentials. He went on to say that during tantric intercourse the head of the penis has to touch the cervix and if this does not happen then powerful cervical orgasms will not occur. While he was drawing a cervix in my book, he went on to explain the three sizes of the male “organ.” (Shiva Linham) and the three sizes of the female “organ” (yoni).

The shape of things to come.

The three categories for the male are: the hare, the bull and the stallion. The “hare” was categorized by a lingham that does not exceed twelve centimeters in full erection. This man is generally quite short in nature, well proportioned with a calm disposition. All the short, silent men in the room began to sweat a little. Swami continued, “The bull is no taller than seven inches, the man is stocky, with a high forehead, large eyes and a restless temperament. He is very ready to make love and is known to be the middle dimension.” This sounded a bit like a crazy man to me, huge eyes, sex crazed and restless. Now came the “stud”, his lingham did not exceed twenty-four centimeters, and I quote, “the owner of such a implement (I stifled a giggle) he’s usually tall, burly, muscular, and has a deep voice.” Many men knowingly and earnestly nodded to each other in the room until she continued, “He’s described as gluttonous, greedy, passionate, reckless . and lazy he walks slowly and cares little about making love, unless “the Swami hastened to add”, he is suddenly overwhelmed with desire. His semen is copious and salty. He is known as a man of great dimension.”

At this stage I had to ask myself if Kamasutra and the Ananga Ranga They were laughing at my expense. None of this sounded even remotely appealing, his descriptions were alphabetized with lazy, lazy, Frankenstein-type men. To say that he was a little distraught would be a true statement. Now it was the ladies’ turn, somehow she knew he wouldn’t be nice.

the lady bites

Women’s by yoni they come in three different sizes, the deer, the mare, and the elephant. With the word elephant I choked on my own saliva and I knew it was going to get ugly. The “deer” was described as having a vagina no more than five inches deep, and the woman would have a soft, girlish body with well-proportioned breasts and solid hips, be a moderate eater, and be addicted to the pleasures of sex. love. hers “yoni juice“It would have the pleasant perfume of lotus flowers. I sat there thinking how a lotus flower smelled, not entirely convinced by this statement, however, I began to scribble lotuses in my notebook as he continued towards the ‘mare’.” Apparently she has a yoni She is no more than eighteen centimeters deep, has a delicate body with wide hips and breasts, and her umbilical region is raised. I thought it sounded a bit like me, unsure how to actually measure vaginal depth, I’d have to go on with the description.

Images of cylindrical rulers dancing in my head, there must be an easier way. Smiling, I looked at my little belly confirming my diagnosis as “mare”. She added that she is versatile, graceful and affectionate, she likes the good life and a lot of rest, she has big and beautiful eyes and a long neck. She doesn’t have orgasms easily and she”yoni juice” It has the pleasant perfume of a lotus. Well, I thought this wasn’t so bad, it didn’t sound like the derogatory descriptions of men at all, but I thought so soon, as I continued with the elephant woman. His yoni she is about nine inches deep, has large breasts, a plank face, and short limbs, is gluttonous, eats noisily, and has a rough, harsh voice. Apparently he is not easily satisfied and has “secretions” that smell like, and I quote, “elephants in heat.” Fifteen pairs of female eyes greeted him with deathly silence.

So size doesn’t really matter.

At the time I wasn’t entirely convinced by the accuracy of these broad statements, smells and all. But as the conference progressed, it became clear that size wasn’t the big issue, it was having a good match. Both Taoist and Tantric sexual practice work on the basis of fit, while the ideal pairing was the hare and the stag, the bull and the mare, the stallion and the elephant. You could mix a stag with a bull, but never a stag with a stallion. If he lingham is too short, a woman will not be able to have powerful cervical orgasms. However, there are positions that can improve penetration; There are also tantric exercises to enhance the size of the lingham if it is indeed to small for the woman. On the contrary, there are positions that allow you to make love more comfortably if the man is too big. Fortunately, Tantra had plenty of answers to these rather private questions.

This was just another morning at tantra school, enlightening, humorous, slightly embarrassing, open-hearted and warm. It was refreshing to be in a room full of people just coming forward to be honest and truthful about some of the aspects of themselves that cause them shame. It was also humbling to see questions being answered, myths dispelled, and students having “aha” moments.

Another day on the inner journey, blissful.

As in, so out

Funny