Tips to captivate girls on your first date

Boring conversations kill dates

First dates are nerve-wracking, they just are, even for someone like me who is confident and has good dating skills. One thing that really catches the attention of girls is your ability to converse. I’ll be honest with you and say that the girls I talk to will actually put up with you being pretty mean in bed, if you’re fun to hang out with. That starts with being interesting to talk about.

So what do you talk about on a first date? After searching the internet for a while, I put together these 5 topics and tips to make sure your first date banter doesn’t get boring or awkward.

Talk about travel, not movies

You will not join your favorite movies, believe me!

Let’s face it, when you start talking about movies, you’re going to think of kid movies. She’s going to think about chick flicks. You are setting yourself up in her mind as someone who is not like her. Wrong move meat head. In a study by Richard Wiseman, less than 9% of couples who discussed movies wanted a second date versus 18% of couples who discussed travel.

This should not be shocking. Talking about travel is something almost anyone can get behind and gives both of you space to express hopes, dreams, and adventures. Movies will only bore her unless you’re a big movie buff!

How you talk is as important as what you talk about

Master the back and forth flow of the conversation.

The key to having a great conversation on the first date is not to dominate the conversation. Let her talk more than you do, but be sure to react and ask questions about what she is saying, adding value to the conversation.

A common pitfall is talking all the time out of arrogance, selfishness, or nervousness. The other extreme is not knowing what to say, so you don’t say anything and let her speak for herself. If necessary, be absolutely random. She starts talking about hairless cats. Anything to get the conversation flowing!

Be genuine, vulnerable and share secrets

Being genuine and vulnerable builds trust and closeness.

Your conversation needs to build what I would call a certain level of consistency and trust. She needs to know emotionally that you are like her, that you have emotions and that you are not just in the conversation to put on your panties, although that might be true.

Arthur Aron, a psychologist at the State University of New York at Stony Brook, is interested in how people form romantic relationships and has come up with an ingenious way to take men and women who have never met before and make them feel close. other.
Since he only has an hour or so to create the levels of intimacy that normally take weeks, months, or years to form, he sped up the process of getting to know each other through a set of thirty-six questions designed to get participants started. rapidly from level one in the McAdams system to level two.

From:Snoop: what your stuff says about you

Let’s be honest here. Whether you’re trying to score on the first date, or trying to build a lasting relationship, it’s essential that the girl across the table trust you and feel connected to you.

Worldly matters will kill you. Instead, get nervous

Go controversial and exciting for better first date conversations

Boring and common questions will force you to be just like any other guy she has ever dated. Consider some interesting topics that are really out there. Don’t be afraid to go wild and crazy with this. You’ll end up with a much more meaningful and in-depth conversation than just talking about sports, family, and her favorite desserts.

We limited the type of discussions online daters could engage in by removing their ability to ask whatever they wanted and giving them a pre-set list of questions and allowing them to ask only those questions. The questions we chose had nothing to do with the weather and how many brothers and sisters you have, and instead all the questions were personally interesting and revealing (ie.
“How many romantic partners did you have?”, “When was your last breakup?”, “Do you have any STDs?”, “Have you ever broken someone’s heart?”, “How do you feel about abortion?”)… Instead of talking about the World Cup or their favorite desserts, they shared their deepest fears or told the story of losing their virginity.
Everyone, both sender and responder, were happier with the interaction… What we learned from this little experiment is that
When people are free to choose what kinds of discussions they want to have, they often gravitate toward a balance that is easy to maintain but that no one really enjoys or benefits from.

From: dan ariely

Want to get laid on the first date more?

dating girls who like to drink beer

OK, my evidence for this is anecdotal, but thinking about it, it’s more or less true. Some informal research confirms this. OkCupid has asked its members a lot of questions and found one question that reliably predicts whether or not women were open to sex on a first date. “Do you like the taste of beer?”

Among all of our casual topics, whether someone likes the taste of beer is the best predictor of whether he or she will have sex on the first date… Regardless of gender or orientation, beer lovers have a 60% more likely to be okay with sleeping with someone they just met. Unfortunately, this is the only question with a significant correlation for women.

From: OkCupid