What you need to know about children of divorce

The following is what you need to know about the children and adolescents of divorce:

• The window of opportunity theory states that there is “a period of time between six months and a year after divorce in which crises with children and adolescents can be prevented.”

• Children tended to view life in extremes (ie, fight all the time or never fight), whereas adolescents had a more realistic view of their parents’ conflicts.

• Domestic violence prevails before the divorce.

• Marital problems are rarely a surprise to children or adolescents.

• Girls tend to experience more post-divorce stress than boys, don’t they? Boys are probably in more denial stages of their feelings than girls.

• Most teens and children have no one to talk to about the divorce.

• More than two-thirds of teens and children believed that the divorce led to serious personal problems.

• Three out of four teens shoplifted after their parents’ divorce.

• More than half of teens and children used drugs or alcohol during or after their parents’ divorce.

• Running away from home is common in single-parent families.

• Fights are often a sign of emotional struggles.

• Suicidal thoughts are common among children and adolescents after parental divorce.

• Anger at self and others is normal for children during and after divorce.

• Sleeping problems were present in most cases after the parents’ divorce.

• After parental divorce, one in ten girls develop problematic eating habits that can lead to an eating disorder.

• One in three teens commits a robbery after divorce.

• Many teens and children drank alcohol after their parents’ divorce.

• Most teens and nearly 20 percent of children became sexually involved during and after their parents’ divorce.

• Cruelty to animals often reflects past childhood abuse.

• After divorce, more than half of adolescents and one third of children feel like hurting others.

• After a divorce, few teens or children talk to their parents about their real problems.

• Nearly two in ten teens and one in ten children are arrested after their parents’ divorce.

• These children’s problems were rarely observed by church staff and volunteers.

• Most of the problems were discovered by teachers and school officials.

• Most children and adolescents think that their emotional problems are obvious or transparent.

• Many children and adolescents feel personally responsible for their parents’ divorce.

• Children believe that the responsibility for the divorce falls on their parents.

• The most common factors involved in divorce are money, physical violence, fights, communication and relationships with third parties.