Will the true sexually bold and confident man stand up?

I’m sure one of the myths created in our society by men to feel good and blindly accepted by women is that women are so messy that is why dating is so difficult and women don’t have the same sex drive than men, that’s why men get less. That shameful.

How do you explain the fact that in other parts of the world women initiate sexual contact, have so much energy and drive that they make their men work so hard in the bedroom that men can never gain a pound of fat? This thing about looking at what goes on in your own bedroom or backyard as representative of “everyone” is so last century. Get out of your caves and holes, boys. What he does not know is to deprive him of what he really wants, and a lot.

Many men in our society spend a lot of time thinking about sex and fantasizing about it, and yet they fear at the same time. They want to be with women in every sense of the word and many of them enter into relationships, but these relationships are not passionate intimate relationships. They are based more on social compatibility (similar values, interests and goals) and less on sexual attraction and passion. This has both positive and negative aspects. Positive because it means that there is good company and they rarely argue. Why would they fight? They have no fire. They don’t make the other’s blood boil. But since there is no flame, the relationship is also predictable and very boring, sexually.

The man concludes that it is because the woman has very little sex drive and therefore exits the relationship to find more “sex” when she cannot inspire the person she is with to want to have more sex, let alone comply. with yours sexually. The boring and incompetent urge seeks. But don’t let me go there just yet …

This weekend, in one of my Fearless Sexuality Workshops, I used one of the “I Dare You” questions thrown at young Africans (ages 12-18) who were preparing for initiation into adulthood: Will the sexually bold and confident man in this room, please get up?

There were eleven men in all in my workshop, but for almost a minute no one stood up. Finally, a boy stood up hesitantly. I asked him why he thought it was “THE MAN”. His response was “I don’t know. I just stood up.”

I asked the other ten why they did not stand up and their summarized responses are something like: “We do not know what to say to women when we meet them or what to do with them sexually, so we signed up for your workshop.” . This seemed like the most logical and analytical answer, right?

Incorrect. A REAL MAN is fearless of heart and soul. FEEL something so powerful inside him, like an inner lion, rising up when his manhood is challenged. This powerful something is not based on a false sense of bravery (aka aggressiveness, which is just FEAR backwards) or mindless bravery driven by greed (hyena style), but is based on INNER STRENGTH. You may not know exactly how it will play out, but you trust yourself to find out as you go, after all, HE IS THE KING OF THE JUNGLE!

But where are these men? Where are the men who ONLY STAND because it is what men should do? Where are the men who take the initiative, take risks and challenge, and acknowledge their actions without making lame excuses? Where are the men who are so in touch with the masculine energy and act without FEAR? Where are the real sexually bold and confident men?

Today’s men spend so much time and energy flirting, initiating conversations, techniques to approach women and routines to seduce them, that these same things have become their excuses for not taking initiatives, risks and challenges that come with BEING A MAN OF TRUTH. Many are too insecure to see what is happening to them and too lame to recognize the fact that an important and crucial aspect of being a REAL MAN IS MATCHING YOUR OWN RHYTHM.

The sad truth is that if you don’t grab the rudder, the boat will drift to where the rudder is pointing. If you do not cultivate a strong sense of your sexual self (bold and confident) and discover when to listen to your sexual instincts, you will find yourself waiting until your hunger for sex and your inner fire and passion, which have been intensifying, You jump like the eruption of a volcano, then you jump up, grab any woman and wait for her to pretend you’re “THE MAN”. And when the woman is emotionally healthy and honest enough to tell you that you are not man enough for her, you quickly rescue yourself by saying, “I really like you. But I’ve decided I’m just not good enough for you. This isn’t about about you. It’s about me. ” At least you’re being honest.

Trusting your intuition and sexual instincts clears your inner vision, leads you to the right woman, and helps you do THINGS THAT ARE RIGHT FOR YOU AS AN INDIVIDUAL rather than someone else (who doesn’t even know you or doesn’t care about you). ti) tells you to do.

Your sexual instincts help you make better decisions at any given time, propose more creative ways and ideas to be with a woman and act immediately without wasting time giving you doubts because your instincts tell you the truth about how you can help yourself physically. , emotional and sexual ways that your conscious mind (picking up the line, starting a conversation, technique or routine) could never tell you. It’s like having your own personal trainer, muse, bodyguard, and advisory council all rolled into one.

In the beginning, when you are just beginning to trust your sexual instincts again, sometimes you will get it right and sometimes you will be wrong. However, with practice, you will naturally get a better sense of when to listen to your natural sexual guide, who is already within you.

Relearning to trust your sexual instincts pays off, in the short and long term.

How wonderful it would be if we all recognized our sexual instincts for what they are: a recipe for mutual passion and intimacy, and a vehicle for true compatibility and love.