Give quality time and gifts

Communication is very helpful, especially when it comes to spelling out “I love you” for a child. It was a great opportunity to, because of the things that I am getting from this career, to become a teenager who spends the summer with me. Although she is from Spain; It came with a gift for me, my husband and my daughter who is not at home at the time. That night was the night to show her that she is doing the dishes after the gift she presented and the excitement I felt when opening it and appreciating it. I decided to wash the dishes one more night! No wonder the Bible says that a man’s gift opens the way for him (Proverbs 18: 6).

Although the gift is not my primary love language, I have learned to appreciate as much as I give. In my culture, the gifts are after the giver; This is to ensure that your reaction, especially when it is negative, does not influence the intrinsic or altruistic value of the gift. Unaware that my husband had arranged to get me a 1999 Honda Accord to help take the girls who spent the summer with us, the following conversation took place between us:

Husband: Do I know you like Honda?

Wife: Sure, before the Toyota Corolla, I used a Honda.

Husband: Come and check this out (he showed me pictures on his phone)

Wife: Good! But it looks like two doors.

Husband: Yes, it’s a coupe

Wife: I don’t like both doors! I have never used one.

Husband: Well, I have it.

How hard I tried to show appreciation from then on, I blurted out after … Those words! No wonder the Bible instructs us to restrain our tongue (James 1:26). A few days later, I came home and said, “As I drove in the rain today, I continued to bless God for you; I wonder how I would have coped with the girls’ visit if you hadn’t brought the car for me.” A hug and he was sure that nothing before those genuine words of affirmation showed him that I really appreciated the generous gift. Most children have come to identify gifts with love and appreciation, it is not surprising that some children gravitate towards adults who give them gifts and this continues into adulthood, leading some to hold a grudge when they do not receive gifts on special occasions, especially birthdays. While it is great to learn and teach how to give gifts and spend quality time, it is very important to teach children to show gratitude to God for his blessings and merciful kindness, which are new every morning (Lamentations 3: 22-23).

We must also let children know, before they discover it themselves, that the gift of time is one that God has given to all of creation in equal measure and what we do with it matters not only to God but to the others. people around us: parents, siblings. , friends, teachers. In fact, all the rest of the language of love depends on time and generosity. What do I mean, we give words of affirmation, we give quality time, we give acts of service and physical touch, we give all purpose, the thesis is possible, because we were given the benefit of time. I remember a few years ago a little girl greeted me happily and insisted on helping me with my bag, so I left it to her. When we got to my apartment, she put the bag on the couch and set off happily, but I called her and gave her cookies and candy; she thanked me and left. Just two minutes later, two children got up under the pretext of saying hello; He knew that they were the reason He did not want to feed His appetite. Target trusted kids, they soon asked for their own cookies and candy and I told them they weren’t going to get any. They asked again if I gave the girl because she helped me with my bag and I explained that I gave her cookie and candy because she helped without expecting anything in return. It was a learning moment and I took the opportunity to tell them to do good without expecting anything in return.

Although many children equate the gift with love, as they grow older they begin to demand meaningful social interaction, communication, and commitment. When this need is not adequately and adequately met, children begin to resent those from whom they seek this need. Now that I have the opportunity to go through this career, I can say that my primary love language is quality time, followed by acts of service, words of affirmation / insurance, physical contact, and gifts. My husband at the initial stage of our wedding will call it His way home and say, “Don’t bother cooking (of course dinner was ready!), I’ll pick you up so we can eat out” gold. ” dinner, let’s go to the movies “and I was screaming in my head,” Can’t you see these aren’t things I need; I want to spend quality time talking! “

When we eat out, people are to our left and to our right and it feels like we are dining with the world eavesdropping. Even in private dining rooms, the waiter comes from time to time to break the moment and the mood. In the movies, although we can snuggle, the fact is that we are in a room full of strangers laughing at the same jokes and crying over the same tragedy invented in the dark room. I remember leaving work earlier one day for my wedding (I was not entitled to a vacation because I just resumed). I did it because I had planned some time at the beach with my husband; Since our courtship was largely long-distance, I was eager to lay down on the beach with him, have a “just you and me” time during which I waited for safe words about the future. It seems that we are walking blindfolded. within. I was also looking forward to taking him to the wedding reception and meeting the wedding team so that he can contribute to the outcome (he arrived in our home country just four days before the wedding). He called to say that a friend has a beach house and that we should go there instead of going to the beach, but as I was driving I thought, “Wow! Even better.” Needless to say, how disappointed I was when I reached our destination, I had a two hour drive to find that the beach house was still under construction and the friend was waiting for us in the open beach shed with his brother and the staff. . But I was so excited that they kept talking (they hadn’t seen each other in years) and most of the conversation just didn’t include me; He was so engrossed that he didn’t see the need to leave even hours later. It was necessary for God not to let the color affect the wedding the next day. I need to say he enjoyed it immensely as I just floated through the entire episode. If God took me as an adult to not tell him that he knows what I do not intend to spend the rest of my life with a man who is not considerate of my emotions, then rest assured that the children will be hurt and can repress the hurts. only to raise ugly head icts later in life.

These point to the fact that two children can have gifts as their primary language, but a neckerchief can mean the world to a child, just as a multi-colored coat meant everything to Joseph and led him to envy. Fill the emotional tank of Check out another child whose primary love language is the gift. Along the same lines, two children may have quality time as their primary love language, but what they want to spend it on may be totally different! Child A may want quality time with Mom just talking and rolling in bed or fixing one Check Up and Child B may want quality time with Dad to eat out, watch movies, and visit sights. Although I was not reliable in discovering the primary love language of the girls who spent the summer with me, I was able to create quality time by structuring dinner during dinner in such a way as to await the grace of the signal of the beginning of dinner. After dinner, I scheduled the reflection time. During which we talked about what they did and what they hope to do. I wait for em normally in the car to chat, before the bus comes to pick them up during the week.

Quality time (communication) being white my main language of love, I am trustworthy to give and receive and hopefully we made the sacrifice to HAVE THEM Spend the summer with us and Take the time to prepare quality meals; poured into their language of gift and act of service while hugging and encouraging them to speak English, clean their space, and cook; Poured into tanks His love of physical contact and words of affirmation. Love em definitely enabled to grow and function properly for the short period of time. It was a challenge to keep pouring myself into the second guest who wanted to smoke and became manipulative to spend time with the guys, but the more I gave unconditionally, the more I saw how to help her overcome the void she was seeking to fill with cigarettes and bits and the more I identified with it. that May brought her to this topic. It was so evident that when we give children in the sphere of our influence unconditional love in an appropriate and appropriate way, we will be able to stop or prevent many vices as we come to understand them deeply and deal with their behaviors, whether positive or negative.