New golf book gets an ace

I don’t play golf. But that didn’t stop me from laughing out loud at story after story in Don Boehm’s new collection of 100 true stories about golf and the players at it. To collect all the Right Distance, Wrong Direction stories, Don has traveled across the country from city to city playing golf. In each city, he has also worked with charities that have mobile mammography vans that travel to urban and rural locations to provide this service. He has collected these stories for entertainment, but part of the proceeds from book sales will also be donated to help uninsured women get diagnosed early and eventually eradicate cancer.

While cancer is no laughing matter, laughter is the best medicine, and the title of Right Distance, Wrong Direction just lets you know right off the bat that this book is going to be fun. When questioned, Boehm’s golf buddies weren’t shy about lavishly recounting stories of his and his friends’ funniest golf shenanigans. Of course, there were times when golfers told Don they couldn’t come up with a funny story, but then, while he was playing with them, you guessed it: the unexpected happened and a funny story came out. He just wishes there were videos for all the stories; they would put America’s funniest home videos to shame. Or maybe they could be the inspiration for Caddyshack III.

Even though I didn’t understand all the terms related to golf, I never got lost following these stories. Sure, I was expecting to read about some bad golf swings and golf balls landing in weird places, but I wasn’t expecting golf clubs flying into the Pacific, birds stealing golfers’ watches, angry moose attacking golf carts, or alligators eating golf balls. Golf. I can’t say much more without revealing all of these juicy and entertaining stories, and don’t forget, they all actually happened! But I will quote a story that when I imagined it, it almost brought me to tears.

Maggie said, “Okay,” as she got up to take her shot. Hitting the ball, one of the men started yelling, “Roll, bitch, roll.” Then Maggie said, “I don’t know why, but for some reason, I hit the ground and started rolling.”

Maggie, her husband, and I were recovering from her retelling of this story. Her husband said that she was wearing a white sweater and pants and was rolling in freshly cut grass with green stains all over it. As we laughed, Maggie ended by saying, “And that’s my story!”

When you’re done rolling around on the floor with Maggie, go outside and get a copy of this book. It will be a perfect read on the golf course between holes or anytime you need a big laugh. And don’t forget that book sales help fight breast cancer.